Ohhhhh where are we now.

 Page 1.

 It seems that the wife listed us as lien holder on the title to the B-I-L’s POS. He called to see if he could get it released so he can sell the car for scrap. I looked at the wife and said “No, if anyone is getting scrap money for that thing it is me”. The wife shook her head “No it isn’t”. “Why not” I asked. “Because the title is still in the sellers name.” It seems that the B-I-L hasn’t paid his taxes in a while and cannot register anything so he has been running on someone else’s plates for a year. I hold a lien on a POS that still belongs to someone else’s as far as the state is concerned. That figures.

 

 Page 2,

 Since the B-I-L has no job and no car he decided to start driving the M-I-L’s car. Now the troll has moved to Columbia Mo. (if you are from the Columbia / Ashland area let me know and I’ll tell you what she drives) so she has to come over here, drop off her car then bum a ride back. She looked at me and said “I’m his mother, what would you do?” By the hatred that followed my answer must have been wrong. I suggested post pregnancy abortion.

 Page 3.

 I was looking online at cars. I think I’ve decided to buy the wife something new and let my daughter drive the tank. The M-I-L asked “Whatchadoin’?”. I said “I’m thinking of buying your daughter a new car”. She looked at the page I was on and said “Which one?” I said “I’ll start with your oldest daughter and keep buying till I’m broke.” She said “No, which car.” “I didn’t think you would by your sister-in-laws a car”. “Odd, you expected me to buy your son a car” I told her. Again, somehow I’m the azzhole.

 Page 4.

 Yesterday we were burning old hay and working around the yard. The M-I-L (sitting on a bench) asked “What are you going to do with the Trans Am when you buy your wife a new car?” I looked at her and as seriously as possible said “I’m giving it to your son.” Her face started to glow. Then I finished my sentence “As soon as he buys the car dealership that sells the car I will be trading it in on for your daughter.” Extinguished that glow real quick like.

 Page 5.

 So after cleaning up stuff (that didn’t matter last week) outside we moved into the house where the kids were put to work cleaning. I said “OK, who is coming?” The wife says “I told you, my great aunt will be here with my grandparents tomorrow.” Well I would argue that she failed to tell me but I would lose as it is 2 against 1 and let’s face it, the husband will usually lose (one way or another) with these types of arguments. I decided to just be facetious and asked “Is this the aunt that drove drunk from Florida to Georgia to see our new baby girl and managed to drive through a ditch and parked on top of my geraniums?” “Is this the same lady that came to your great grandmother’s funeral and fell on top of our daughter as she was to drunk to even sit up straight?” “Is this the same……..” That was as far as I made it. In all fairness she is a sweet lady but she will kill someone someday but they keep turning a blind eye.