Chapter 3: THE GIFT

   First the good news. My MIL didn't stay to long. She lasted about 2 weeks and decided it was time to go back home. Yep, she stayed just long enough to get us in trouble with our neighbors and dump her daughter off with us. She had totally failed as a parent to raise this child and had left it up to us.  A 16 year old with a bad attitude and no desire to achieve anything that didn't involve Bon Bons and a day filled with Montel, Jerry and Opra. It is hard to blame a child for their actions when you know first hand how bad the parenting was but I was learning to and fast.

 

   One day at work I'm sitting at the desk (as Desk Sergeants do) and I see my boss walk in. I said "Hi" and he said "Stand up and give me your weapon, your relived of your post." These are words that I truly thought I would never hear muttered at me. This had to be a bad joke but I was still stunned to say the least and after a few seconds I realized that he was serious. After I'm paraded past everyone and read my rights I look up to see my wife in the other office. "WTF is going on?" I calmly asked. You and your wife are being investigated for assault on a minor. Being a smart a$$ I quickly snipped back "I would never hit a miner." "Besides, I hate small dark places". Not the crowd to start my stand-up career with. There’s not many things more unsettling than being relieved of duty and put in a room to sit while you have no idea of what is going on.

 

    About 20 minutes later my boss came back in and said "you can go back to work". I then asked "And my wife?" He said that I could drive her home. Come to find out that the sister-in-law was yelling and screaming and pushed my wife (the SIL is about 140 lbs heaver) and my wife slapped her. The SIL had a nose that would bleed if you looked at it wrong and two drops hit the porch as she ran off to be with her new found hoodlum friends. The neighbor (the one the MIL pissed off before she left) called her husband who then called my boss. I’m assuming that he did so as it was a 100% chance that I would have gotten the 911 call.   This way my boss could have a patrol head out to my place without my knowledge.  My wife said that they were really nice to her and that it was just a misunderstanding. I told her that her psycho sister just had me walk the gauntlet of humiliation and disgrace and I will have to face them all in 20 min. I got back to work and talked to the investigator. He told me it was all dropped and that my SIL would need to find another place to stay as she is no longer welcome on the installation. I asked what happened and he said he couldn't go into detail. As I walked away I heard him say to his colleague in a voice just loud enough for me to hear "That girl is nuts, I would have slapped her too."